I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
