Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
