Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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