you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.