he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old