please come you make the beer taste better
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.