I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now