me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
