I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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