my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
