You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Randomize
