So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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