it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize