Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
We're facebook friends in real life
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
