Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Randomize
