went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
