Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
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