You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
