last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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