i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize