i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
