I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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