we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
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I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
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Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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