Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
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