Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
