How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Randomize
