Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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