I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
