I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Small penises have feelings too.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Come on in and take your pants off
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