Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
