turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They took my balls.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize