I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Randomize
