Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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