Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
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