There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
