You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize