I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
