I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Rumble strips road head = magical
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
