Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Randomize
