Dual....:-)
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
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Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
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I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
that may or may not have been my penis.
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