For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
