Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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