escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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