oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
