She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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