Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
