Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize