Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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