So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
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