bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
