Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
