lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
