watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
